Christmas Day 1852 by Randy Willis

by Randy Willis

Joseph Willis whispers in her ear, "If there are white horses in Heaven they will need pack mules." Ole Sally seems to understand.

**Joseph Willis and Ole Sally swimming the mighty Mississippi River at Natchez 1798**

Backstory from the novel Three Winds Blowing by Randy Willis

✯ The wind of war fueled by slavery begins to blow. In a time of tradition and chivalry, Joseph Willis discovers his beloved Louisiana has changed. It is now a land of innocence lost.

✯ Frail Joseph Willis is 92. His much younger wife, Elvy, insists someone else care for him. As Christmas approaches, Joseph has not heard from her for nine months.

✯ Malachi Perkins is a white man who once saved Joseph’s life. He is Joseph’s trusted friend. Malachi falls in love with Miss Eliza, a person of color he buys to give her freedom. Her two small children, Randall and Emily, were sold separately from her on the same day. This happened at a New Orleans slave market years before. She has not seen them since. Malachi vows to find them.

✯ Joseph’s younger understudy, neighbor, and friend is William Price Ford. Ford buys two slaves at the New Orleans slave market. Ford buys Miss Eliza first, but her two children are already sold. Ford also buys a slave named Solomon Northup, a free man kidnapped from the North. After four years, Mr. Ford must sell Solomon and Miss Eliza due to financial problems. Solomon’s new owner is brutal and sadistic. Mr. Ford seeks Solomon’s freedom. Solomon would later write 12 Years a Slave.

✯ A Frenchman and former gunslinger, Theo Cormier now lives life according to the Bible Joseph gave him. Joseph was a friend of his father. Theo wishes to introduce Joseph to his bride, Miss Adelaide, and name their firstborn male after Joseph.

✯ Not only has Joseph outlived his contemporaries, but his mule Ole Sally has, too. Memories of them swimming the mighty Mississippi River flood Joseph’s mind decades before. Ole Sally is a “tad bit” cantankerous in her old age. Joseph whispers in her ear, “If there are white horses in Heaven they will need pack mules.” Ole Sally seems to understand.

Joseph Willis whispers in her ear, “If there are white horses in Heaven they will need pack mules.” Ole Sally seems to understand.

Christmas Day 1852

December 25, 1852, Longleaf, Louisiana Excerpted from Daniel Hubbard Willis, Jr’s Diary

Great-grandpa Joseph Willis relived much of his life in Louisiana during the wagon trip. It took place in October of 1852, from Evergreen to Longleaf. He poured out his heart to us. I discovered a joy in writing. I enjoyed keeping an account of all his stories.

Just when it seemed that no day in our family would ever top the 1845 Willis Feast of Thanksgiving—it did.

It all began the first time I saw a white Christmas. It was December 25, 1852, near Longleaf. The entire family was there. Each family member brought a decoration for our tree. The cedar was so big that we had to cut it down three times to get it inside the door. There were strings of popcorn, wooden figures, and sugared fruit. Paper dolls were cut out by the girls. We had gingerbread. Somebody even brought a bird’s nest.

We had ornaments that had meanings, too. A pine tree symbolizes eternity. Pinecones meant warmth. A teapot signified hospitality, which our family has always taught.

There were candy canes with the Good Shepherd’s crook. The white stripes represent the purity of Jesus and his virgin birth. The bold red stripes signify Christ’s shed blood. At the top of the tree was the star of Bethlehem made from a quilt. And the Christmas stockings stuffed with nuts, candy, and fruit hung on every available nail.

I’ll never forget the looks on my cousins’, brothers’, and sisters’ faces. Dolls, books, tablets, pencils, wooden soldiers, and even a rocking horse were unwrapped that happy morn. I got a new writing tablet that I started using to write this.

Christmas Day started with a few flurries, and everyone ran out to see the snow. Mother taught us to make something I’d never eaten before—ice cream. She showed us how to add milk, cream, butter, and eggs with the snow in a pewter pot. She had read that President Thomas Jefferson made ice cream with split vanilla beans. Imagine that!

Our traditional hot spiced cider warmed us from the cold. The smell of roasting chestnuts in Mama’s cast-iron skillet in the fireplace brought back precious memories of Christmas past.

As the flakes began to fall steadily, more guests arrived, including Mr. Cormier and Miss Adelaide. She was with child, due in a few months. Mr. Cormier told Great-Grandpa, “If the baby is a boy, we are gonna name him Joseph.” Great-grandpa’s face shone with an all-knowing peace. You could hear the excitement in their voices as Mr. and Mrs. Cormier brushed the snow off.

Mr. Malachi Perkins, Miss Eliza, Randall, and Emily came together. Malachi had located and bought the children out of slavery. Mr. Perkins approached Great-grandpa directly. He hugged him and said, “Pastor, we consider ourselves engaged. However, as you know, by Louisiana law, we can’t get married. We’ve fallen in love, and if it were legal, we’d be hitched already.” He hesitated, then went on, “We so want to do what’s right in the eyes of the Lord. I remember ya tellin’ me how your mama and daddy had a clandestine weddin’. I don’t want to bother ya on this special day. Could ya think about it in a few days? Then, let us know if ya’d perform our weddin’ ceremony?”

Great-grandpa took all of two seconds, grinned, and said, “Ain’t gotta think about it, Malachi. I’d be honored…if ya don’t mind if I do the ceremony sittin’ down. I’m a half-step slower than I used to be.” Everybody laughed. “Well, maybe a whole step or perhaps two.”

“Ya know, Pastor, ya could get in trouble for doin’ it!”

“Yes, I know, but I’m ninety-two, and my race here is almost run. What are they gonna do, shoot me? They already tried that when I was only knee-high to a grasshopper.”

The entire room seemed to be filled with sweet joy. We all cheered and clapped. Randall and Emily looked the happiest.

Great-grandpa motioned for me to come over. He whispered in a voice real low, “Quite a few folks are named after me now. If you ever have a son, Daniel, you should name him Randall, after Eliza’s son. You can even nickname ‘im Randy, if you so like. That way, our descendants will remember that miracle and share it with their children.”

We watched the storm bringing heavier snow, which seemed to be driven by a blue norther as our neighbors, Mr. and Mrs. Robert Graham, arrived. And, yes, Julia Ann was with them. Great-grandfather asked to be helped to the barn to talk to his aged four-legged friend, Ole Sally.

He told her he had a gift for her—a mule blanket all the Willis women made. They made a matching blanket for Grandpa, too.

I listened to him, sweet-talk her in her ear. He thanked her for being a good friend and told her he could never have done it without ‘er. As Ole Sally leaned over Great-Grandpa kissed ‘er on the nose. She backed her ears, and he laughed, saying, “Aww, you know you like it.”

We assisted him back to the house, and I asked him to share his annual Christmas story again. Everyone gathered around the fireplace. He looked like he was doing what he loved best.

The wind was blowing the snow so hard we didn’t hear Mr. Ford arrive with Mr. and Mrs. Peter Tanner, the brother and sister-in-law of his late wife. Mr. Ford rushed through the door with a big smile, saying, “Looks like Solomon Northup will be freed on January 3rd. He’s gonna be a free man!” Again, everyone clapped and cheered and said praise the Lord.

Great-grandpa’s heart was full of joy. Mine, too! He beamed, saying, “I don’t see how a Christmas could get any better than this.”

He’d started to tell the Christmas story when there was a knock at the door. I jumped up to answer the door. There stood a snow-covered, half-frozen woman in a green hooded cape. Her hair was all wet and matted. All of a sudden, I recognized her—and so did everyone else. There were a few gasps and then lots of hugs. Great-grandpa couldn’t see very well, as his eyes were dimmed by age. He asked, “Who’s that? Who’s here?”

She put her finger up to her lips to keep everyone silent. No one said a word as she approached Great-grandpa, hugged him, and said, “Merry Christmas, Pastor Joseph Willis. I love you with all my heart.”

His eyes glistened as he pulled her to himself and said, “I love you even more, Miss Elvy Willis. Welcome home! I’ve saved a place beside me for ya. You’re just in time to hear my favorite Christmas story for the hundredth time.

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Joseph Willis’s annual Christmas Story

“He was born in a little-known village. He was fetched up in another community where people said nothing good would ever come from. He worked with his hands in a carpenter shop until he was thirty. After that, he traveled as a country preacher for three years.

“He never wrote a book. He never held an office. He never commanded an army. He never owned a home. He never went to college. He never traveled more than a hundred miles from where he was born.

“He was rejected by the religious folk of the day. While he was still a young man, the tide of popular opinion turned against him. One friend denied him. Another betrayed him. Few understood him. Many even hated him.

“He was betrayed for a few coins and turned over to his enemies. He experienced the mockery of a trial. He was beaten. His beard was plucked out, and he was spit upon. A razor-sharp crown of thorns was pressed into his head. Afterward, he was nailed to two rugged pieces of a tree. This cross was rightfully prepared for a notorious criminal named Barabbas. The country preacher was lifted on the tree in agony between two thieves. His executors gambled for his only possession—his cloak.

“His blood flowed down the cross into the ground. By then, most of his friends had abandoned him. When he died, he was laid in a borrowed grave. Then, on the following Sunday mornin’, he rose from the dead. Nothing has ever been the same since.

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“As we look back across eighteen hundred years, we examine the evidence and sum up his influence. We must conclude that all the armies that ever marched have not had the influence on mankind as him. All the ships that ever sailed have not had such an impact. All the governments that ever sat have not. All the kings that ever reigned did not either.

Our great nation’s presidents combined have not. This Country Preacher has had an unparalleled influence through the ages. His influence extends to this Christmas Day in which we celebrate his birth!”

Not a sound was heard ‘til Great-grandpa said, “Merry Christmas, everyone!”

I got a stirring in my heart and started singing, “Joy to the world, the Lord is come!”

Great-grandpa and Miss Elvy joined in: “Let earth receive her King; let every heart prepare Him room….”

Finally, everyone was singing. “And Heaven and nature sing, and Heaven and nature sing, and Heaven, and Heaven, and nature sing.

“Joy to the earth, the Savior reigns!”

Merry Christmas from our family to yours! Randy Willis

Choose your Destiny

Hell and Destruction are never full; So the eyes of man are never satisfied. —Proverbs 27:20

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There are insatiable desires in man of appetites, recognition, money, and lust. Many are always wanting more, bigger, and better things. This is nothing new.

For Satan himself transforms himself into an angel of light. —2 Corinthians 11:14

The eyes of man are never satisfied, the scripture records. Our restless heart that cannot find contentment in worldly possessions. We seem to be always seeking more.

Man has a hole in his heart. It’s a void, an emptiness. We can never fill it with relationships or money. Nor an endless array of entertainment, stimulants. Family and religion cannot fill this emptiness either.

Why? Only God can fill the “hole in our hearts.” Jesus Christ can and will satisfy that sense of longing and emptiness. We are designed—created—for God alone to occupy our souls: our heart, our mind, our will, our emotions.

For You formed my inward parts; You covered me in my mother’s womb. —Psalm 139:13

We need a personal relationship with the Lord of Creation, Jesus. This means a one-on-one connection with God in the Flesh. Jesus, the Christ of the Bible, fulfills this role. He alone can fill the longings of our hearts.

Millions try pills, drugs, and alcohol. History is littered with those who have taken this route. Some try education, career, family, and religion. My friend, only Jesus can fill the longing in our hearts. He alone can fill the hole in your heart—your soul —your mind.

Jesus loves you. He came to this earth because of that love. Jesus was beaten, and a crown of thorns was pressed into his head. His beard was plucked out. He was nailed to a cross naked. Shedding his blood, God’s blood for you and me.

His coat was gambled for. And dying high on that hill called Calvary—while his beloved mother wept. His disciples, who had witnessed His miracles, all fled—save one. Despised, mocked, and rejected, he prayed.

Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do.” And they divided His garments and cast lots. —Luke 23:34

All of this for you and me. That’s how much he loves you and me.

Do you want joy and peace, and a sense of purpose? Do you long to know why the Holy God in Heaven created you? Is his intent to jerk you up by the “nap of your shirt” and then condemn you with a smirk? Not hardly.

For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved. —John 3:17

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Is your heart broken? Have your dreams failed? Are you overwhelmed? Are you oppressed? Jesus said in Like 4:18:

The Spirit of the Lord is upon Me, Because He has anointed Me To preach the gospel to the poor; He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted, To proclaim liberty to the captives And recovery of sight to the blind, To set at liberty those who are oppressed. —Luke 4:18

Join me on the most extraordinary destiny ever offered to mankind.

This most extraordinary destiny ever offered to mankind.

You are of purer eyes than to behold evil, And cannot look on wickedness. —Habakkuk 1:13

The Lord God in Heaven cannot look upon sin, for He is Holy. Yet He loves us, sinful man, and has provided a way for us to be reconciled to Him. To spend eternity with Him.

This is the story of this most extraordinary destiny ever offered to mankind.

Let’s begin with the last invitation in the Word of God, it is in Revelation 22:17:

“And the Spirit and the bride say, ‘Come!’ And let him who hears say, ‘Come!’ And let him who thirsts come. Whoever desires, let him take the water of life freely.” —Revelation 22:17

Are you thirsty? Then come. Let him who hears come. And whosoever will, can come.

The invitation is to you—to me—to “whosoever will”—to everyone!

Bring your disappointments, failures, fears, and heartaches. The Holy Spirit says, Come to Jesus, our Savior.

God loves you. He wants to save you. He will save you. Come to Jesus, and drink the water of life freely.

Christ suffered, He bled, He died because He loves you and me. Listen to the still voice of the Holy Spirit, bidding you come to Jesus.

Don’t wait—come today! The Bible says in 2 Corinthians 6:2 today is the day of salvation.

The Ends of the Earth

Look to Me, and be saved, All you ends of the earth! For I am God, and there is no other. —Isaiah 45:22

All you ends of the earth” includes the Aboriginal people of the Central Australian desert.

All you ends of the earth” are those in darkest Africa.

All you ends of the earth” are the isolated tribes in the Amazon rainforest in Brazil.

All you ends of the earth” are presidents, world leaders, and kings.

All you ends of the earth” is the polished lawyer, the gifted doctor, and the brilliant college professor.

All you ends of the earth” is the prostitute. It is the drug dealer. It is the rapist. It is the thief. It is the murderer.

All the ends of the earth is me—and you. Come today!

Why a Bronze Serpent

“So Moses made a bronze serpent, and put it on a pole; and so it was if a serpent had bitten anyone when he looked at the bronze serpent, he lived. —Numbers 21:19

Bronze represents judgment. The serpent is destructive, deceptive, and the most dangerous creature you will ever encounter. He is our adversary and the father of all lies. His name is Satan.

He does not appear with horns, a red cape, and an ugly face. Instead, he appears as an angel of light and says, what harm can what I offer do? No one will know. No one will be hurt.

It’s your body. You are in control. You can be your own god. You can be like god. No one can tell you what you can and can’t do. He is Satan, and he comes to destroy God’s most cherished and loved creation: You.

The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly. —John 10:10

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Satan transforms himself into an angel of light. “Take a little cocaine,” Satan whispers. “It will make you feel good. No one will know. You’re not hurting anyone.”

The Greek term pharmakeia, in the Bible, is the root of the word “pharmacy,” in English. Pharmakeia is used in the New Testament (Galatians 5:20; Revelation 9:21; 18:23) to describe sorcery, witchcraft, and drug-related magic.

Jesus says, He has come that we may have life and have it more abundantly. Choose an abundant life in Jesus today.

You don’t need hangouts, hangups, or hangovers. You need a personal relationship with the Lord of Creation, who created the Universe and you. Jesus is His name.

In that relationship lies your future, your blessed Hope, your salvation, and your joy. And your Christ blood bought destiny. Choose your destiny today. It has already been paid for with Jesus’s blood on the cross of Calvary. But you must accept God’s free gift of eternal life. That is done through faith in Jesus’ death, burial, and resurrection.

“For Satan himself transforms himself into an angel of light.” —2 Corinthians 11:14

You and I have been bitten by sin, like the Israelite’s who followed Moses out of Egyptian bondage.

The Israelites had to choose whether to put their faith in God. It was a simple act of faith, but a life-or-death decision. We too face such a choice.

Those who looked lived.
Those who looked were healed.
Those who looked were made whole.
Those who looked were saved.
They didn’t wait until they were better people.
They didn’t have to touch it.
They just looked.

Jesus tells us in John 3:14-15 that this is a picture of Him being lifted up on the Cross of Calvary.

And as Moses lifted up the serpent in the wilderness, even so must the Son of Man be lifted up, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have eternal life. —John 3:14-15

The bronze serpent represented the people’s sin. According to the Scriptures, Christ was made sin for us.

Will you look to Jesus?—will you put your trust in Him?—the One who died for your sins.

Will you put your faith in Jesus?—the One who shed His lifeblood for you—and me.

My son Aaron Willis’s Automobile Accident

Some years ago, my eldest son, Aaron, was in an automobile accident. His back was broken so severely that the doctors said he might not ever walk again.

Several vertebrae in his lower back were fused. After that, he was able to begin the long task of healing from the spinal fusion surgery. He was encased in a rigid plastic back brace from his neck to his waist.

Later, his doctor agreed to let him briefly remove the brace and shower as long as someone was with him.

I was driving to pick Aaron and his brothers up for the weekend. Unbeknownst to me, his brother Josh helped him remove the brace as instructed by the doctor. Aaron could take a hot shower in his shorts. Josh was with him, but was much smaller than Aaron at that time. Aaron’s doctor approved all of this.

I began to exit to stop at the Austin post office on St. Johns, off Interstate 35, when a small but clear voice said, “You need to go now.”

I passed the post office exit. I drove as fast as possible to Wimberley, an hour away. I wondered what that warning was about.

There were no cell phones then. As I entered their mother’s home, I asked his mother where Aaron was. She said in the shower.

I ran to it, and the moment I entered the bathroom, Aaron said, “Dad, I’m dizzy.”

I stepped into the shower and placed my arms under his arms from his back. He immediately passed out.

I told Josh to help me move him to a bed while their mother called 911. His dead weight was more than I could have imagined.

We got him onto his bed without re-injuring his back. I knew if he had fallen, he probably would have been paralyzed.

I prayed as I followed the ambulance to the emergency room at Austin’s Seton Medical Center. I noticed the symbol on the back of the ambulance.

It was the American Medical Association’s (AMA) logo of a serpent wrapped around a staff.

The sign of healing medicine reminded me of the bronze serpent on the staff lifted up by Moses. Christians believe that’s where the symbol originated.

But, more importantly, it reminded me of Jesus being lifted up on a cross for my son. God’s son suffered in place of my son.

To this day, I cannot see that symbol without giving thanks to the Lord for that warning. I remember the shed blood of Christ lifted high upon a cross. It was for my sins, your sins, and the entire world’s sins.

When we arrived at the hospital’s emergency room, the doctors gave him intravenous (IV) fluids. They also gave him two bottles of Gatorade for dehydration.

The hot shower, combined with pain medication and dehydration, caused his blood to rush to his feet. This resulted in him fainting.

Look

Will you look to the One lifted up on a cross for you and me? Will you look to the Great Physician—Jesus—to heal you of all your pain, emptiness, and disappointments?

Will you look to Jesus? He took your place on the cross and died for your sins. Through Him alone, you can be made new, whole, and born again.

Choose

Jesus hung between two thieves (criminals) on a cross. One rejected Him, but the other put his faith in Him.

“Will You remember me when You enter Your kingdom?” one thief asks.

Jesus replied, “Assuredly, I say to you, today you will be with Me in Paradise.” (Luke 23:43)

Both of those men were guilty of crimes serious enough to warrant the Roman death penalty. One put his trust in Jesus, and the other chose not to.

The question is, which thief on the cross are you? The one who said yes or the one who said no?

Now, there was the third cross that day. It was for another criminal named Barabbas, and he represents us.

Jesus was crucified on a cross meant for Barabbas—it was your cross—it was my cross, too.

Come

Come just as you are.

Will you say yes to Jesus—today?

There’s a Scripture that I love, and it explains things so clearly even I can understand.

If thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. For with the heart, man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth, confession is made unto salvation. —Romans 10:9-10

You can settle this question in heaven and on earth today. Say yes to Jesus. Accept His pardon, just as that one thief did on the cross. There are no prescriptive or mandated words. Praying is just talking to the Lord.

Open

Jesus said, “Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and dine with him, and he with Me.” — Revelation 3:20

Ask

Self-improvement will not qualify you for salvation, for God’s Word says, “There is none righteous, no, not one.” (Romans 3:10)

Comparing yourself to others will not work either: “For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” (Romans 3:23)

We seek to commend ourselves to God. However, God says our good works are like filthy rags in His sight [Isaiah 64:6]. If we are ever accepted in the eyes of Holy God, it must be through Christ our Lord.

There is no other way for says in Habakkuk 1:13, “You are of purer eyes than to behold evil, And cannot look on wickedness.”

If you could be good enough to pay for your sins, think about this. Why did Jesus have to die for you?

Jesus bore your cross and my cross. He took our place on the cross. He shed His blood for our sins on that cross high on a hill for all the world to see.

The Just for the unjust. The Righteous for the unrighteous. The Godly for the ungodly The sinless Lamb of God for the sinner.

According to the Bible, we all have feet of clay and fall short of God’s glory. Our righteousness is described in the Bible as filthy rags. God’s grace (his undeserved favor) is available to us all. However, we must accept His gift of forgiveness. This gift was bought and paid for on the cross with Jesus Christ’s lifeblood. You can say yes to Jesus’s free gift right now.

Our greatest need is forgiveness. Christ came to forgive us, but we must accept that free gift. Jesus said in Revelation 3:20:

Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and dine with him, and he with Me. —Revelation 3:20

Jesus knocks, but you must open the door to your heart, to your life, to your future.

It’s not a prescribed list of words. In Luke 23:42, one of the criminals crucified with Jesus pleads, “Lord, remember me when You come into your kingdom. His heartfelt cry of faith from the cross saves him.

Jesus answers in the next verse with a promise. He says, “Assuredly, I say to you, today you will be with Me in Paradise.” The first person to accompany Christ to Heaven was this lowly thief on the cross.

Isn’t it time to decide which “thief” on the cross you are? Are you the one who put his faith in Jesus Christ? Or are you the one who rejected our Savior who gave His lifeblood for us?

The most famous 25 words ever written:

For God so loved the world. He gave His only begotten Son. Whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. —John 3:16

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If these words are how you feel in your heart, then pray:

Heavenly Father,

I pray to You, asking for the forgiveness of my sins.

I confess with my mouth. I believe with my heart that Jesus is Your Son. He died on the cross at Calvary so that I might be forgiven.

Father, I believe that Jesus rose from the dead. I ask Jesus to come into my life as my personal Lord and Savior.

I turn from my sins and will surrender to your will throughout my life.

Your word is truth. I confess with my mouth that I am born again. I am cleansed by the blood of Jesus!

In Jesus’ name, I pray. Amen!

Reach out and touch Him today!

For she said to herself, “If only I may touch His garment, I shall be made well. —Matthew 9:21

Epilogue

I was headed to Temple Baptist Church with Grandma, and my owner’s manual: the Bible. It was Grandma Lillie Hanks Willis who first poured Jesus into me; sometimes, she even used words. That’s my dog Pedro wanting to follow me.

We attended Temple Baptist Church in Clute, Texas, every Sunday morning, Sunday night, and Wednesday night. It seemed that everyone attended church in those days.

On a Wednesday night, my mother could not attend church. I walked to church from our home at 519 Coleman Street. My twelve-year-old sister Marjorie accompanied me. I was only eight.

I had no intention of that night being any different from any other. I cannot recall a word Pastor Bill Campbell said in his sermon. But I remember vividly another voice that spoke to my mind—my heart—my spirit.

It was not an audible voice. It was a still, gentle voice, tender but ever so clear, telling me to go forward and accept Christ as my Savior.

I recall my response to the Holy Spirit as if it were five minutes ago: “Lord, I am too shy. I would if my mother were here to go with me.”

I felt someone touch my left shoulder. My sister Marjorie was sitting in the back row with her friends. She could not see my face, for I was seated near the front.

She said, “I’ll go with you if you want me to.” I immediately stood and walked with her to the front of the church and made my decision public.

I know you do not have to have an experience like that to be born again. Nevertheless, I am grateful for that experience; it has never left my mind or my heart.